Tuesday Night~
I remember being such a little girl, tiny, kneeling beside my bed, hands together, fingers pointed upward, praying to God. First i would say the Lord's Prayer, and then the Hail Mary. Then i would list all my family and friends, very careful not to forget anyone, so that God would protect them and keep them safe. Then the God/Lisa dialog would really begin. I would tell him how i wanted to be a nun like St. Teresa,( the little flower,)and spend my life in prayer. I would tell Him everything, always aware that if i wasnt"good" i would end up in hell, or at the very least, purgatory. So i always tried to please, always tried to be "good". I was the one that always shared, always gave, and lived by the golden rule, literally. I liked the idea of a quiet, peaceful life in a long black habit, too. And i would tell Him how i would live my life for Him.
Even in my darkest times, i have never given up Him up. I have been wicked, and i have been wild, and i have turned my back in anger and dispair. But those earliest times, those pristine, hand steepled talks with God, well, they glue me together in times like this. Good guys don't finish last. Tomorrow is always a promise. That's what rainbows are for.Later